Mysteries in Life

What I Know About Love

Wednesday, March 20th, 2013

My Cat Friend, Karl

I put the following on my FB Fan Page:

“When I got up this morning, I found my young, much loved, Maine Coon cat, Karl dead on my bedroom floor. He had died instantly with a genetically bad heart. He had slept with me part of the night, snuggling in my hair and under my chin and covers as he always did. I knew he would die suddenly in the far off ‘Someday’ but not today. Every day I told Karl, many times a day, how much I love him. That’s all we can do with our pets and people. Love them, tell them, treat them well & help them be as happy as possible. Everything ends here on earth, ‘Someday.’ xo venus”

A few weeks after I got Karl as a kitten, my vet told me his sad future. I chose to live with that eventual reckoning and keep and love him. Just as with any relative of mine, my animals are with me for life, no matter what.

I loved Karl intensely, always knowing the outcome, knowing I only had a year or two with him.  I kept him and I loved him, knowing that the pain I would have, would be in direct proportion to the deep love I chose to feel for him.

My ex-husband has never had another animal since we divorced many years ago. He still recalls his pain when our 2 dogs died, and he says he can’t go through that, again.

I tell him, “By doing this,  you’ve left a number of desperate animals without a home that could have had safety and love with you.” I say, “I know that the pain of loss is huge, but the pain of not loving a human being or a creature, and refusing and being afraid to love again, is greater.”

I tell him that when we close our doors to loving animals or people, we ask for and accept a more barren existence.

My cats then climb into his lap and he loves them for a moment. Then, he leaves my house and goes back to his life of golf and bridge and beer.

(more…)

The FOD Girls

Wednesday, March 13th, 2013

Lexi Meets The Neanderthal Man

Summer is saying, “So far nothing odd has happened today for you to write about in your blog, Mom.”

And, then it happens.

The three of us are playing hooky from our regular lives, today. We’ve come to Balboa Park to give my granddaughter Lexi, who is 10, some museum culture. Lexi has been badgering us for months, to take her to see the “Naked Neanderthal men at the History Museum.”

I’ve thought she might be disappointed. In America, nobody has genitals in these kinds of places. It’s just not done. This may be why the Neanderthals died out.

The cavemen are indeed a disappointment.

Next, we have lunch outside at a fancy place on the Park grounds. While looking at the menu, Summer says, “Lexi will have a big Margarita.”

Lexi snaps to attention and gets excited.

“Oh wait,” her mother says, ” I was thinking about myself, not you Lexi. Sorry.”

Lexi slumps in her chair and peers at her dismal glass of water.

So far, nothing *FOD has happened.

As we get up from our table after lunch, we notice small white hearts encased in tiny plastic snack baggies, on the ground.

Oh my! (more…)

Venus Walks Out Of A Funeral

Wednesday, March 6th, 2013

The Church Where It Happened

The funeral service  is more than half an hour late. It still hasn’t started. I have been sitting in this pew for an hour because I got here early.

Unfortunately, I have eaten something that doesn’t like me and my guts hurt so much I can barely sit still from the pain.

The man next to me is from my old Multilevel/Networking life. I have known him for more than 25 years. He sniffs up the drip from his nose, leans toward me and says, “I am now 83 years old.”

I tell him that is amazing and that I will never catch up to him.

He takes a moment, looks me over, then says, “Ummmm. Give it a few more days.”

Eeeh gads.

No one should be told this at a funeral! (more…)


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