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Children Disappear Into UFO

Wednesday, July 31st, 2013

 

The UFO That Whisked The Kids Away!

Here is the UFO that swallowed my grandkids.

Lexi, 10, has assured Loch, 7, that he will love being slammed and flattened against the wall, defying gravity as the UFO spins rapidly in the air.

I’m not so sure that we won’t have to stop the ride and go into the UFO and save Loch from his folly.

We’re at the local Fair. What I’ve noticed  about this Fair is that most people here, (the public and the carnival workers,) need to wash their hair.  Also, most folks are a bit more than just fat; they’re pretty much dragging loose flesh around as they slap through the dust.

I feel my own hair and pinch the skin muffin around my own waist.

We’ve been here for several hours. I’m tired and hot and I want to go home and wash my  hair and lose weight.

Here is the joke Loch tells Bill and me as we drive to the fair:

” What do you get when you cross the road with a dog and a rose?” The answer: “A cauliflower!”

We think he means, ‘What do you get when you cross a dog and a rose?’

We find his joke hysterical and he is much pleased. Then Bill tries to explain that you don’t cross a road with a dog and a rose to get a cauliflower, you cross a dog with a rose.

Loch doesn’t get it. Neither does Lexi and they are outraged when we laugh even more.

They keep shouting, ‘Why are you laughing so much! Explain it!’ We do, again and again in various ways and get no where. Maybe because there are a lot of holes in their understanding of the birds and the bees. In Loch’s case, he knows nothing, and Lexi has had only had a bit of ‘The Talk’ which sent her into outraged hysterics, at the time.

At the fair, it’s getting late. The kids want to eat dinner and then come back and do more Rides.

Lexi chooses chips with melted fake Velveeta cheese as her meal and Loch gets a hot dog. For dessert, they can’t decide. Caramel corn, waffle cake or poison dyed snow cones.

I’m glad when they choose the evil snow cones. Do you know why? Because the kids are anxious to get back to the Carnival for more Rides. It’s getting cold and dark and I want to go home.

My approval of the snow cones works perfectly. After the kids are halfway into them, because they are wearing shorts and tiny tops, they get chilled and want to leave!

And so we do.

Once on our way, the kids start badgering us about that darn dog crossing the road again, but I tell Bill, ‘Let’s leave this one to their folks!’

And so we do.

(And, now that I have finished this Blog, I am going  to the kitchen and make another peach cobbler. The one I made last week with an oat topping, didn’t turn out so well. I had to eat it as a breakfast cereal!)

*Do you know the kind of work I do when I’m not busy having Adventures?  THIS YEAR is a great time to have a Phone Reading with me!   Visit me at www.GodIsAlwaysHappy.com for rates and availability.

*Would you like to receive my NEWSLETTER: ‘The Juicy News’ ? Sign up where you see the Blue Head Phones on the right side of this blog story on the original blog page: http://www.godisalwayshappy.com/blog

*If My True Life (this Blog) gives you a lift, please consider EMAILING it to your friends. You will keep me writing and that is good for my mental health. Better To Get These Weird Things Out Of Mind, Rather Than Keep Them In, right?

*You can also find me on Google+ and FB Fan Page under venus andrecht.  


 

 

 

 

Toad Fish Soup With Shrimp In Red Pants

Wednesday, July 24th, 2013

The grandkids are here. Both Lexi and Loch are fighting pretty much non-stop. I try and keep them separated.

Loch is ‘cooking’.’ He is cooking with mud, rocks and weeds. He has just asked me if I would like some ‘Yellow Jacket Crunch.’  “Made with real Yellow Jackets,” he tells me, that have drowned in his kiddie pool.

Bill is also served a bowl of Hornet Soup. He pronounces it, “Very good!”

There is no photo  here of ‘Grumpy The Plummer’ who has just been here and gone. Yes, I have plumbing problems.

I load ‘Grumpy’ up with excess peaches and apples  from my trees before he leaves my house.

Here is what the kids and I have been doing this week.

The kids are fighting from the moment I pick them up. As I believe I have already said.

I got almost no sleep last night. The kids were sleeping but I wasn’t.

Today, the kids  announce that all the food I feed them is suspect and they want to know what is in everything I cook for them. I text their mother and tell them this is her fault.

Earlier this morning as we drive up to my brother and sister-in-law’s jewelry store I say, “We’re going to visit your Uncle Art and Aunt MaryEllen.” They say, “Who are they?”

OK, looks like the kids need to visit me more often.

We go and visit the Carnival that is being set up across from the Senior Center. Tomorrow evening , we will go and ride the rides and eat funnel cake and cotton candy. And, maybe throw up later in the night.

We visit my friend at the Art Gallery as we are looking for fertile eggs. They aren’t here but they will be by tomorrow. You have to realize  this is a small town and an artist  brings her excess eggs to an art gallery. These are the best, most orange eggs, laid by chickens that truly run loose and the best thing is the eggs are free!

This morning the kids and I go back to the Pool Supply store. Why? Because yesterday, I bought Loch a small toy boat that runs on the pool water with some kind of radio control.

This boat is a real ‘Key Buy’ as Loch, who was frantic to have it, seems to have no interest in actually running the boat in the pool.

Yesterday, at the pool store, Lexi got a large, blow up dolphin to ride. However, we find our bicycle pump will not pump it up. So, this morning we go back and buy a foot pump from China that does a very desultory job of pumping and while pumping (for a very long time) by foot, Bill says the ‘S’ word a number of times.

My friend Sonja comes over at the end of the day and we have a drink or two. The sun is now thinking of setting and I realize I need to get a blog out.

I apologize to you. This blog is it. I’m going to bed,now, and it is very early. I am going to bed at the same time the kids do.

P.S. Lexi says to tell you she remembers her aunt and uncle! She is also adamant that I talk more about her in my blogs…I am just not allowed to embarrass her. I am not sure how to do that as almost everything I say embarrasses her, now that she is 10.

Good night. I apologize for this less than perfect, poorly put together blog, but Baba is really tired and there are 2 more days to go. xo venus

And PS, I left out the visit today to the metaphysical book store, the Chamber of Commerce and the ride up another mountain outside of town where Lexi and Loch asked me why I was taking them up another mountain. They were afraid we were making another trip to see The Chicken Lady.

They would, however, like to see ‘The Big Rock Candy Mountain’ which is really called Mt. Woodson, and guards the town. Their mother told them that when she was little she found a door into the mountain that leads to all the candy inside. So, now this is a hike that we need to take at some point.

OK, this is it. I really mean it, now. I am going to bed. xo venus

*Do you know the kind of work I do when I’m not busy having Adventures?  THIS YEAR is a great time to have a Phone Reading with me!   Visit me at www.GodIsAlwaysHappy.com for rates and availability.

*Would you like to receive my NEWSLETTER: ‘The Juicy News’ ? Sign up where you see the Blue Head Phones on the right side of this blog story on the original blog page: http://www.godisalwayshappy.com/blog

*If My True Life (this Blog) gives you a lift, please consider EMAILING it to your friends. You will keep me writing and that is good for my mental health. Better To Get These Weird Things Out Of Mind, Rather Than Keep Them In, right?

*You can also find me on Google+ and FB Fan Page under venus andrecht.  


 

 

The Magical Stool Sample

Wednesday, July 17th, 2013

Polly And Mickey Thinking About What They Will Do Next

I like to buy Polly and Mickey the best food and the best toys. A small sample of my extravagance is below.

 

Here Are Just A Few Of The Toys I Have Bought For My Darling Kittens

And here is what they play with:

Mickey Here With 1 Green Dog Leash, 1 Bottle Cap, One Small Vitamin Bottle And A Plastic Stool Sample Collector

They especially love the stool sample bottle. I am supposed to be collecting their poop to take to the vet, to check for worms. However, I can rarely find the bottle. Mickey and Polly find it and they run off with it.

The Magical, Ever Captivating And Favorite Stool Sample Bottle

The photo below has nothing to do with any of the above. It’s a blatant advertisement. I want to remind you that I paint paintings to bring Happiness Into Your Home and to Bring Other Good Things Into Your Life. To see many more paintings with prices please go to:

http://www.artmojos.com/     Thank You. xo venus

The Blue Bird Of Happiness

*Do you know the kind of work I do when I’m not busy having Adventures?  THIS YEAR is a great time to have a Phone Reading with me!   Visit me at www.GodIsAlwaysHappy.com for rates and availability.

*Would you like to receive my NEWSLETTER: ‘The Juicy News’ ? Sign up where you see the Blue Head Phones on the right side of this blog story on the original blog page: http://www.godisalwayshappy.com/blog

*If My True Life (this Blog) gives you a lift, please consider EMAILING it to your friends. You will keep me writing and that is good for my mental health. Better To Get These Weird Things Out Of Mind, Rather Than Keep Them In, right?

*You can also find me on Google+ and FB Fan Page under venus andrecht.  


 


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