Odd Blessings Much Appreciated

So, it’s decided. I am going to join Match.com. After years of a non-relationship with Bill (see blog #1) I realize I need a little more entertainment in my life than I have been having.

Rather then me writing about my ‘Fabulous Self,’ I have asked my sisters and my daughter to write short blurbs about me to put on the site. I said, “List my faults, along with the good stuff.”

Here is a line that my sister Polly put at the end of her summation of my personage: “Attractive, clean and walks almost everyday.”

What? Clean?
I think this line is a hoot but a man might think that my sister is saying ‘Thank god, we have finally gotten her out of rehab and, at least for the moment, she is pretty well functional.’

What finally dragged me, reluctantly, to the idea of giving network romance a try? Well, this week has been rather exciting by my standards and I’m thinking maybe it portends a change in my life.

An old boyfriend has slipped into my days. He tells me he has always loved me and wants to see me. That’s very nice and appealing but he’s married.

A man I have known for twenty years through business, called me from another state to talk about business along with another man we know: we three were having a 3-way phone conversation.

We were re-hashing our previous business lives together when suddenly Peter said, “Roger, don’t listen!”
Then, “Venus, do you remember when we were in Hawaii on that business trip and we hired a car and went to the other side of the Island, to the beach?”

“Maybe?”

“And you put on a one piece bathing suit and I thought, “Oh! My god, this is the sexiest woman I have ever known!”

“Thanks Peter, and that was twenty years ago.”

“Roger! Don’t listen!….Venus, have I ever told you that I love you?”

“No, Peter, I don’t believe you have.”

“Well, I do love you. Roger! Don’t listen!”

That same morning I had had another unusual experience.
I was at the coffee shop next to my brother’s jewelry store. My brother Art and I were standing outside by the cafe tables when he leaned against me and pointed to a tall, handsome man with a long ponytail, sitting in a chair with a cup of coffee.

“Hey, Venus,” he said, raising his voice and pointing. “There’s someone you went to school with.”

The man didn’t look familiar with his goatee and long hair but then, we didn’t wear those things in grammar and high-school.

My brother took my hand and walked me over to meet the fellow who stood up and looked at me.

“This is Colin R. You went to school with him.”

Oh my god! Colin R.?! I couldn’t believe it. I have been thinking of Colin for many, many years, wishing I could find him and talk to him.

I grabbed Colin’s hand and said, “I am so glad to see you!”

He said, “I see you around and I know who you are but I never say anything.”

My brains were twirling inside my head.
“Colin, I have wanted to apologize to you for something I did when we were in 6th grade. I was eleven. You were the class bad boy and one day our teacher, Mr. G. took all of us kids out into the school yard and had us get in a big circle.”

Colin was looking down at me as I rushed on.

“I don’t know if you remember, Colin, but I do and I am so, so sorry for what happened. Mr. G. put you in the middle of the circle and asked for volunteers to step forward and castigate you, to tell you how disruptive you were. And, I stepped out and told you my thoughts on your wicked behavior. I have suffered over this for years. I had no right to do that to you! I’m sure you had very good reasons for acting so badly. Something must have been going on at home that was hurting you.”

Colin, still staring at me, said, “Yes. My father was an alcoholic and it was pretty bad at home.”

“My dad was an alcoholic, too,” I said. “I think we were all kids with bad stuff going on at home but we never talked about it. We didn’t know that almost all of us were suffering, too.”

“Yeah,” Colin agreed.

“I am just so very sorry, Colin, that I said those things to you.”
Pausing and looking at the ground, I felt a little teary and gushy.
“I am so happy that I have finally been able to talk to you and apologize. What a blessing.”

And, what a true blessing it is for me to finally, finally be able to unload the emotional burden I’ve carried for years, the burden of adding to the hurt of a child who was already hurting. I hope, in at least a tiny way, that Colin feels better now, too.

I am lucky.
And, with all the other blessings I am counting this Thanksgiving Day, I give thanks for meeting Colin and for my very odd, love filled and entertaining week.
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WINNER OF A FREE 15 MINUTE PHONE SESSION WITH VENUS *Michael Borell* Offer good through Dec 1st, 2008. After that, null and void


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