Posts Tagged ‘ chocolate ’

Is It Luck Or Is It Chocolate?

Monday, May 21st, 2012

The Artist.. Wondering If He Will Be Famous Now Or After Death

Stan, my art teacher, is excited about something. He and my two art friends and I have been meeting and painting together for ten and one half years now. We feel like we’re almost related.

“Listen to this one,” he says as he fingers his little beard with his hand. “I was at a Ggallery  in New Mexico last week and the owner tells me a true story.”

According to Stan, a woman walks in, points at a huge not-very-good painting for $7,500 and says, “I want to buy that one.” Then, she buys a few more and ends up spending $8,500.00.

She asks the owner to have the paintings shipped to her home in Colorado. He says he will, but it will take him three weeks before he can get to it. This is okay with the woman.

Two weeks later the lady emails him and says she needs the paintings at her home in no less than three days. She’s having a big party and the art has to be there.

The gallery owner gulps and says, “I thought we had an understanding about when I can ship them.”

The woman says she must have them in three days. (more…)

VENUS GETS HIT BY ‘LIGHTENING’ AT LUNCH

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

We’re watching lightening fritz through the sky and hammer the hills around us. This is Southern California and a lightening storm is a novel sight.

Eight of us Art Guild Girls are sitting outside on a stone terrace, next to a undulating golf course, having lunch. The sky may be full of danger but as I am soon to find, there is more emotional danger at the  table.

We ‘girls’ range in age from 40 to 80 plus, years old. We are the President of the Guild, on down through the ranks to The Sunshine Girl, which is me.

We do all the work that keeps the art meetings happening in town, we bring the demo artists that perform for all the local artists once a month, we bring in money, award scholarships to High School kids, keep the Art Library going, put on art shows and etc. We deserve a lunch at the end of the fiscal year and I have finally convinced my Guild friends that we do indeed need one.

The ladies ask me to order the wine. I order a bottle of red shiraz named ‘Layer Cake.’ How can one not order something with a name like that? And, I order a nice chardonnay.

We’re having a fun time. Oh sure, one lady has to tell us a story about a cat that she took on a trip that kept disappearing and we have to follow that darn cat through almost every state in the union. I keep saying, ‘So did it all work out OK?’ and she keeps saying, ‘I’m not through with the story yet,’ and everyone rolls their eyes and takes another lick of ‘Layer Cake.’

We’re eating and drinking and laughing and I’m thinking, ‘Oh, this lunch was such a good idea. We are all so happy together.’  Suddenly, ‘Ardath’ who is lost in her 70’s somewhere, looks at me and says says in her high-pitched wavey voice, “Oh Venus..you have such a won-der-ful personality! You have a fab-u-lous per-son-ality!”

I’m grinning and thanking her, “Thank you Ardath, that’s so sweet, thank you..” when she adds loudly, ‘But, that’s all you’ve got!”

“Whaat?”

“Are you always this way?” she asks.

“Whaaat?”

Then, Ardath leans across the table and looks at me intently, as she shouts, “Are you Bi-po-lar?!” (more…)


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